New Zealanders have always had a reputation of being laid-back and humbled, not letting all too much bother them.
But for some reason, the relaxed vibe and humbleness we’re famous for rarely applies to people who decide to go ‘out of the norm’ in New Zealand.
It only took me a few minutes to find numerous videos of alternatively dressed young people complaining about a lack of acceptance and high judgment in New Zealand.
Most of the comments sections were filled with people who felt the videos were relatable, and most people online said experiences were worse while walking in public or using public transport.
One of Canterbury University's newest clubs, Gothsoc, were able to provide some insight into why this phenomenon seems so frequent.
Gothsoc executives at a recent gothage sizzle event
Gothsoc is a club that centres around the alternative community, particularly gothic people, and they try to increase the participation and activity within the community.
Gothsoc executives at a recent gothage sizzle event
The club’s founder, Ame, believes she is lucky to never have experienced a first-hand interaction with a stranger on the street while dressed alternatively, but many of her friends have.
“A couple of times at Uni I have been complimenting people in alternative outfits, and I’ll catch another group laughing at me or whispering stuff. It’s never got me too much though”, she said.
Though it can be difficult at times, the executives have found their own ways to ignore some of the smaller reactions they receive to their appearances.
“Sometimes when I am dressed very alternatively, I will step onto the bus and the driver will physically flinch or recoil, so I just tap my card and walk on”, Cal, the club’s vice-secretary, said.
Cal comes from Ashburton, and before that, Hastings; two smaller and more rural areas than Ōtautahi.
Though Christchurch, of course, has areas to improve in terms of acceptance, Cal explained that they would not be able to wear almost any of their outfits around Ashburton without being insulted by someone.
Although some people may be lucky with their experiences, Gothsoc’s newest executive, Rowan, has had some more intense troubles in the past.
“Last year I was attacked at a bus stop for looking ‘gay’, which was basically just how I look now. He kicked me multiple times and I ended up with a concussion because of it.”
Rowan found the perception people have for LGBTQ+ and alternatively dressed people are heavily comparable in New Zealand.
“I used to live in Wellington, and my high school was very acceptive of everyone. But since moving to Christchurch, I have found a lot of people to be more judgemental, and everyone seems to be a lot more traditional, especially in regards to the gay community.”
Gothsoc’s treasurer, Pierce, believes who you are with and where you are have an equal impact on what you are wearing and how people perceive you.
“It really depends on how loud your outfit is. A lot of the time I will be dressed in baggy sweatpants and a black top, with a nose hoop connected to my ears. I get complimented a bit for this, but I feel like that’s because it fits the standard of traditional beauty a lot better.”
Pierce’s friend on the other hand, dresses much louder, with punk style patches, and Pierce has noticed that his friend will receive far more concerned looks than he does.
He also found out the way in which he is judged in New Zealand is far different from how he used to be treated in America.
“I went to high school in America, and it was a lot more shoulder checking and physical stuff then. Here in New Zealand, it’s a lot more passive, with snarky looks and people whispering something when I walk by. I guess it is better, but not by a lot.”
Social media has been a major influence on the alternative community in New Zealand, but whether it is for better or worse is hard to say.
“Pretty recently I had just left the mall, dressed quite punkish, and a group of boys started pointing at me and filming me, which is always hard to just brush off, knowing that could be posted and seen by anyone, anywhere”, Rowan said.
But the club explained social media has also made it a lot easier to meet people and form a stronger community.
While posting on platforms like TikTok and Instagram can sometimes lead to negative interactions, often it can also lead to new relationships with like-minded people and provide a path for people new to the community to start somewhere.
Nevertheless, New Zealand seems to be stuck in a generational loop of being unable to accept the differences in appearances.
As our small country only continues to grow, it seems about time this practise is revisited and see that the humble kiwi rep we have extends to everyone, rather than picking and choosing who to be kind to.